Signs she is resentful.
My wife is frequently irritated with me and is often snappy or angry, even though I try hard to do what she asks. Is this resentment? What are some signs she is resentful? How will I know?
What are the signs of resentment in a marriage?
Here are 7 common behaviors that may indicate there is resentment in your marriage:
- Withholding Sex … knowing it will upset or hurt your partner
- Lack of Affection … just not feeling inclined to be warm or responsive
- Increased Number and Intensity of Fights … about even the smallest thing
- Sadness … as if you are dealing with loss and grief of something (and you are!)
- Feelings of Helplessness and Hopelessness … and not knowing what to do about it
- Reluctance to Celebrate Milestones … being unable to raise the energy or interest
- Withdrawal from the Relationship … which may be interpreted as being sulky or indifferent
All the feelings of resentment are negative, and result in stress and sadness. She won’t like feeling them, so you could perhaps try to talk to her about her feelings in an effort to deal with them.
And the big question is – what causes resentment in the first place?
Resentment is an unresolved hurt about something that has happened and causes physical pain whenever you think about it.
There can be many reasons why she resents you. However, resentments usually start with anger about something that you have done, for example, flirted with another person or left laundry across the bedroom floor.
OR it may be something that you don’t do when she asks you to, such as helping out with the children or cooking.
The resentment causes her pain whenever she thinks about that event or situation.
So basically, she has an expectation or a need that is unfulfilled from her point of view…
And she blames you for the hurt it causes her.
Unless her hurt feelings are resolved, the resentment hangs around.
This helps to explain why your wife may resent you. The pain gets worse over time. And she wants you to stop the things you are doing or have done, so she can stop hurting.