Remember when he was interested in your body – and now you have a sexless marriage?
When you first got together, and were madly in love, sex was easy, right, and a priority? Even little disappointments (and little kids) didn’t get in the way!
It was as if you were obsessed with this man, and would think about making love as often as he did. Well, almost!
So how did you get to this place you find yourselves at now, perhaps going months without sex?
How is it that in the beginning, you complained because he was only ever interested in your body – and now you complain because he is never interested in your body?
This situation can leave you feeling unloved, anxious, suspicious, and even damage your self-esteem.
If you are mad with him (and it doesn’t take much) then you are likely to not respond if he does indicate he’d like a bit of sex, because it sure isn’t what you feel like right at that time.
Doesn’t he KNOW that you need to sort out that stuff you are mad about before you can have sex?
And if you try to sort it, and he gets frustrated or sarcastic – well, that’s the end of that. Complete turn off. Not tonight, darling!
And if you cuddle up to him and suggest some tenderness might be nice – and get the brush off – well that may be the last time you make the approach. Rejection is never nice, so avoidance is the easier option.
OK so you always knew that the wild passion of the first months and years could not last, but you never expected it to get to ZERO.
And now that it’s been such a long time, how do you re-start sex? It’s awkward and weird, and you don’t have those exciting in-love feelings to help you along.